


Text Me Maybe

by lahdolphin



Category: Tennis no Oujisama | Prince of Tennis
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, Sexual References, mainly dialogue-only, texting fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-03
Updated: 2015-06-03
Packaged: 2018-04-02 15:10:02
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4064539
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lahdolphin/pseuds/lahdolphin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Marui texts the wrong number and ends up with befriending the stranger who answers.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Text Me Maybe

**Author's Note:**

> This work was heavily inspired by the texting-based fics by merlywhirls here on ao3. I decided to do my own text-based fic after reading their wonderful Wolfstar fics. 
> 
> Marui's text is in italics and Niou's text is in bold.

_how do u make that drink?_

**What drink?**

_uh it had a candy name_

_u told me all about it_

_IDK I forget?_

**Lemon drop?**

_don’t think that was it_

**Oreo cookie?**

_that’s not a candy_

_get ur shit together man_

**Grape/orange crush?**

_nah_

**Jolly rancher?**

_FUCK YES!_

_how do u make it?_

_my roomie and I r having a party and I was bragging about how to make this new drink_

_and I’d kinda look like an idiot if I didn’t know how to make it haha_

**Google exists.**

_that’s so much work tho_

_and I’m at work rn_

_well research_

_same thing really_

**Google.**

_please? I’ll send a pic?_

**That’s more than slightly sketchy**

_I need to show up my roommate_

_I have money riding on this_

_one classy af dick pic will not kill me_

**You are shameless.**

_Please?_

**Sour apple schnapps, melon liquor, vodka, sour mix, sprite**

**Tastes like a sour green jolly rancher**

_You. Are. A. Lifersaver._

_haha candy puns_

**I cannot believe I just helped you**

_u still want that pic?_

**I don’t believe in receiving dick pics without knowing someone’s name**

_I put my name in your phone_

_stop dicking around_

**I’m not.**

**No idea who you are dude**

_wait_

_ur not Suzuki?_

_we didn’t meet at the bar last weekend?_

_Y THE HELL DID U RESPOND_

**As a bartender I feel responsible for giving drink advice when asked**

_omg_

_I almost sent my dick to a stranger_

_I am such a slut_

**Yup, you totally are**

**Could be worse**

**You could have sent it**

_Fuck me._

**Again, I don’t do that shit without knowing a name**

**Let me know how the drink goes over at the party**

 

* * *

 

**You never told me your name**

_Because ur a stranger_

**You almost sent me your dick**

**And I told you how to make that drink**

**What are you, fifteen?**

_21_

**See? Now we’re not strangers**

**I know your age**

_fuck u and ur shitty flirting_

**I would considering fucking if I knew your name**

_oh and what’s UR name?_

**Trickster**

_WTF r u a stripper?_

**I’m not stupid enough to give my real name to a stranger**

**But I’d also never send my dick to a stranger**

_I can’t tell if ur annoying or trying to flirt_

_or both_

**I can confirm that I am both.**

_u can call me bubble_

_its my grindr name_

**Trickster is mine there too**

**Looks like you’re in my area**

_yeah I figured u just fuckin messaged me_

_r u hips pierced?_

**Your profile pic is your tongue ring**

**You have no room to talk**

_that was when I was 18 and stupid_

_the pic turns guys on tho_

_dont have it anymore_

**Not doing it for me**

_well rnt u a special snowflake_

**I am**

**And I’m only not impressed because it’s a shit piece of work**

**Did it get infected?**

_yeah how'd u know?_

**I have more things pierced than my hips**

_that’s kinda hot_

 

* * *

 

_jolly rancher was a hit btw_

_roommate couldn’t believe I was telling the truth_

**Glad I could be of service**

_yeah…_

_we have another party next week and I need a new drink_

_I kinda bragged again_

**What kind of drink do you want?**

_something to make this annoying underclassmen stfu_

_make him pass out real quick_

**You’re a student?**

_yup_

_uni not high school_

_junior going on senior_

**I thought all the universities let out already? Don’t you have a summer break?**

_bunch of us r on campus doing research this summer_

_like I said_

_drink to fuck shit up_

_can u help or not_

**Oh I can help.**

**Alabama slammer**

**Southern comfort, vodka, amaretto, sloe gin, OJ, sour drink mix**

**Keep out of reach of children and anyone who wishes to keep their brain cells**

_haha thanks_

_how old r u btw?_

**I’m actually a sixty year old man in his underwear trying to seduce young boys**

_that would explain the white hair on grindr_

**Hey now**

**My hair is amazing**

_seriously how old r u?_

_grindr says 20 but hasn’t been updated in forever_

**Twenty-one, same as you**

_k thanks for the drink_

_will let u know how it goes_

 

* * *

 

_annoying underclassman dancing to uptown funk on counter top_

_he hit his head on the lamp_

_brb dying_

_hes stripping hes stripping!_

**Videos?**

_I don’t actually hate this kid so no_

**Fair enough**

_omg he just fell_

_laughing my ass off_

_roomie yelling at me_

_laughing harder_

**Are you drunk?**

_maybe a little_

_wanna see my dick?_

**Very funny.**

**I am being sarcastic if you cannot tell in your drunker stupor**

_and I’m serious_

_took a bunch of nice pics after meeting suzuki at the bar_

**That guy you thought I was?**

_yeah_

_the pics have good lighting and shit_

_they’re very flattering if I do say so myself_

**You text well for a drunkard**

_autocorrect is my bff_

_so my dick?_

**No thanks.**

_k ur missing out tho_

**Go take care of your drunk friend. Glad the drink went well**

_it tasted amazinnnng_

**That explains a lot actually**

 

* * *

 

_I went through my texts from last night_

**And?**

_I apologize for trying to send u a dick pic all willy nilly_

_and for the record I was telling the truth about my dick_

_it is very nice_

**I’m sure it is**

**Is your friend okay?**

_yeah he crashed on our couch which should be punishment enough_

_that thing is so damn uncomfortable_

_has springs and shit that try to fuck ur ass_

_not fun_

_if I wanted to get fucked in the ass I wouldn’t lie down on a sofa_

**Right. You have more class than that**

**You’d text your dick to strangers in exchange for drink recipes**

_damn straight I would_

 

* * *

 

**What do you study at uni?**

_it’s 1 in the moring wtf_

**I’m on break**

**Bartenders work nights**

**You don’t have to answer**

_molecular biology_

_sequencing fly DNA this summer for my senior project_

_I’m a total nerd because I actually like it_

**I’m a nerd too I guess. I like math**

_EW_

_we can no longer talk_

_it is impossible_

**I’m rolling my eyes right now.**

**I actually study math at uni.**

_what don’t wanna be a bartender forever? haha_

**I don’t hate it but it’s not a long term career since my tips depend on my level of attractiveness**

**Girls hit on me thinking I’ll give them free drinks**

**Would probably work if I swung that way**

_so ur totes gay?_

_did I really just fucking say that_

**Yeah.**

**Are you gay? You have a grindr so…**

_bi_

_everyone thinks im straight tho cause I just dated a girl a few months ago_

**So why are you responding to me at one in the morning?**

_doing research for project_

_promoter sequences r the shit_

**I’m having war flashbacks to my intro bio course.**

_yeah?_

_how’d u do?_

**B+**

_nice nice_

_I got an A_

**I would hope so if it’s your major.**

_what like u got an A in ever calc course u took?_

**I did. Highest grade too**

_wow so ur that nerd_

_the one that breaks the curve_

_ur that dick_

_and ur not responding_

_guess ur break ended?_

_I’m headed to bed_

_night_

 

* * *

 

**It’s two in the afternoon. I just woke up. I don’t have any coffee.**

_same_

_wait r u asking me out?_

**I am just complaining about my lack of coffee.**

**Would you like to go out?**

_tbh I’m purposefully not gonna answer that_

_just whatever u do don’t mix a five hour energy with monster and coffee_

_I learned that freshman year before finals_

**How’d that work out for you?**

_I text strangers asking if they want to see my dick_

_how do u think it went_

 

* * *

 

_so what else do u have pierced??_

**You’re a really blunt pervert.**

_well I feel creepy stalking all ur grindr pics_

_none of them show anything but ur hips and chest_

**Labret (that bit just below your bottom lip), tongue, eyebrow, and multiple in the ears.**

_k_

**Just k?**

_really k_

**You are impossible.**

_super really k_

_amazing awesome super really k_

**Please stop**

_FUCK YEAH AMAZING AWESOME SUPER REALLY K_

**Now you’re just embarrassing yourself.**

_that’s not new_

**I figured.**

**Also my dick is pierced.**

_k_

**And we’re back to the start.**

 

* * *

_I need a drink QUICK_

**Ugh you woke me up dickhead**

_in the lab people asking what else I can make_

_lied and said I had to piss_

_in the first stall texting_

_HELP_

**Screaming Irishman is vodka, bailey’s Irish cream, and frangelico**

**A white Russian is vodka, kahlua and cream**

**A bartender has to have options**

_THANK YOU THANK YOU_

 

* * *

 

_I just ran into suzuki_

_hes asking why I didn’t text_

_oh god_

_gotta explain he gave me the wrong number_

_he’s asking for texts to prove it_

_he’s gonna know I nearly sent u a dick pic_

_okay he knows_

_he checked out ur grindr_

_he says ur hot so he forgives me_

**So are you gonna hook up with him?**

_no fucking way_

_that ship has sailed_

**Even after you took all those nice dick picks for him?**

_he doesn’t deserve my dick pics_

_he had my number and never texted_

_I deserve texting_

_I am worth it_

**Whatever you say**

**Random fact: you’re saved as Dick Pic Bubble in my phone since I still don’t know your name**

_ur Drink Guy in mine_

_changed it from suzuki awhile ago_

**I’m honored.**

_u should b_

_also I think suzuki wants to fuck u_

_just a heads up_

_hes messaging u on grindr I think_

**Fuck you, Dick Pic Bubble.**

_love u too Drink Guy ;)_

 

* * *

 

**Suzuki is really annoying. He can’t take a hint**

_yeah I got that vibe 2_

_u being direct?_

**He asked if I wanted to go out and I sent**

**No. I have no interesting in dating you or having sex casually or in the long run.**

**Word for word**

_and…?_

**He sent me a dick pic.**

_did we miss out on anything?_

**Not at all**

**You can see his toilet in the background. Very low quality dick pic.**

**0/10 would not suck or fuck**

_omg brb I’m dying_

**And it’s not even fully hard. He’s doing himself no favors with this pic**

_just ignore him?_

**Blocking him on grindr now**

_r u a top or bottom?_

_just curious_

_we talk about dicks a lot_

**I don’t even know your name**

**Do you think I’m a slut who sends out dick pics for drink recipes or something?**

_WHEN WILL U LET THAT GO_

 

* * *

 

_DRINK EMERGECNY_

**Sea breeze is vodka, cranberry, and grapefruit juice**

_THANKS_

**WHY ARE YOU TALKING IN CAPS**

_I DON’T KNOW_

 

* * *

 

**On break. You awake?**

_sadly yes_

_what happens when u take a break?_

_no drinks for ten minutes haha_

**I always work with someone so I can take a break and other reasons.**

_?_

**Not the best at responding to customers**

_did u yell at someone once and need a babysitter?_

_is bartender parol a thing?_

**Not even close.**

 

* * *

 

_should we meet IRL?_

**What brought that up**

_Idk_

_I like talking to u_

_I don’t even know what ur voice sounds like_

**My voice isn’t that great.**

_don’t care_

_I think ur cool and want to talk to u_

_date or not_

**Not right now.**

_oh okay whatever_

 

* * *

 

_I think I need to back out_

**Out of what?**

_pretending to know shit about making drinks_

_someone I’m researching with asked me to bartender her party_

_and I panicked and said yes_

_if I admit to lying now I’ll look like a dick_

_please don’t make a dick joke_

_don’t need that shit right now_

**What’s wrong with saying you’ve been lying?**

_I’ll look like an idiot_

_and a dick_

**So? They’ll forget. You’ll forget. In ten years no one will care.**

_I’m freaking out don’t be a dick_

**I’m not…?**

_fuck sorry_

_anxiety issues kinda freaking out_

**Don’t really know much about that so I can’t help.**

_just fuck_

_fuck_

_needed to talk to someone_

_can I call u_

**Texting is better.**

**Take deep breaths?**

_head between legs_

_and not in the fun way_

**And you’re texting? That’s impressive. Really impressive.**

_don’t mean to brag but I could win the Olympics at this shit_

**I’d watch that**

_haha thanks_

_my ratings would always be at 100%_

_1 viewer every time_

**Who says I’d watch every time? You’d have to keep me hooked, give me a plot and characters that I care about**

_next week Marui Bunta, 21, hyperventilates in the women’s restroom because the men’s was locked_

_stay tuned_

_see if he pukes_

**Get a drink and relax.**

_don’t really think that’ll help but thanks_

**I am a firm believer that the world would be a happier place if everyone ate dark chocolate and drank some amaretto every once and awhile**

_ugh dark chocolate?_

_y not just torture urself_

_shoot urself in the foot_

_refuse to hold puppies and kittens ever again_

_deny urself JOY_

**Let me guess… you like milk chocolate.**

_hell yeah I do_

_milk chocolate ftw_

**You take chocolate very seriously.**

_I take ALL candy seriously_

_I will fight u over it_

_I have fought over it_

_distract me pls_

**Yellow is a really weird word. Whenever I consciously try to spell it, I can’t**

_LLOL_

**LLOL? Not LOL?**

_literally laughing out loud_

_what r u?_

_an old man?_

_HOW DO U NOT KNOW THAT_

**I promise you that no one says that**

_they totally do_

**No, they don’t.**

_do too_

**Are you five?**

_yup_

**An alcoholic, candy addict five year old. Must be rough.**

_u have no idea old man_

_shit someone just came in_

_gotta go_

 

* * *

 

_um hey sooo_

_thanks for talking or texting or whatever_

_it helped_

**No problem.**

 

* * *

 

**Just so you know, you told me your name when you had your panic attack the other day**

**I know you probably didn’t think about it**

**So I figured I should make us even**

**I’m Niou Masaharu**

_still gonna leave u in my phone as Drink Guy_

**You’re still Dick Pic Bubble in mine.**

_wouldn’t have it any other way_

 

* * *

 

**I think that underclassman you got drunk is at my bar**

**He’s talking about how he danced to Uptown Funk and fell on the floor then passed out on a friend’s sofa**

_black hair and green eyes?_

_kinda hot in a weird way?_

**Yeah it’s him. And he is attractive in a weird way. I don’t know why**

_he looks like he’d be kinky af_

**Ah okay.**

**I get it now.**

_yeahhhh_

_he’s in a polyamory relationship with two dudes sooo_

_how the fuck do u spell that word_

**What word?**

_polyamory_

**I think you spelled it right**

_my phone keeps underlying it_

**Wait. You text in abbreviations and never capitalize the first word even though you have spell check on**

_yeah_

_I’m lazy_

_autocorrect adjusted to my laziness_

_I’m a new level of a lazy_

_soon I shall take over the world_

_after a nap and a few drinks_

_and some milk chocolate BECAUSE I AM FUCKING NORMAL AND DARK CHOCOALTE IS DISGUSTING_

**Oh my god. You are crazy.**

 

* * *

 

_I got a random day off and am bored af_

_talk to me_

**Needy.**

_u love it haha_

_but seriously_

_talk to me_

**I’m getting lunch with a friend in an hour so I can’t talk long**

_that’s okay_

_what do u want to do with math?_

_u never said_

**Maybe teach or something**

**Or become a professional hacker and become the country’s most wanted**

**I’m flexible**

_haha_

**What about you, Mr. molecular bio major?**

_grad school and research_

_idk y I just like it_

**Nothing wrong with that**

 

* * *

 

Marui texted Niou until he got a message from him saying he needed to leave to get lunch with his friend and would talk later. Marui sent a response— _k ttyl_ —and checked the time. 

He rolled out of bed, stuck his head out into the apartment, and shouted, “JACKAL!”

A few moments and several curses later, the bathroom door opened and Jackal stumbled out, a towel hastily wrapped around his waist. He stared at Marui. “ _What_?”

“Let’s get lunch.”

“Don’t shout like that because of food,” Jackal said. He sighed. “Text Akaya. Tell him to meet us at that diner on the corner. If he doesn’t want to come, tell him I’ll pay.”

“You’re being generous today.”

“I’ll end up paying anyways. Might as well plan on it.”

Marui laughed. He ducked back into his room, texting Kirihara as he changed out of his pajamas and into decent clothes. He grabbed his wallet and keys, and dicked around on his laptop while he waited for Jackal to finish getting ready. 

It was uncomfortably hot out. Marui groaned and complained the entire way to the diner, a little family run place with good French toast and the best lunch specials for several blocks. They were seated at a table by the window behind two guys—some old guy with long white hair and a younger man with glasses.

Marui checked his phone instead of ordering, but there was nothing from Niou. He was obsessed. Why didn’t Niou want to meet in person?

“Marui,” Jackal said, snapping. “Are you listening?”

“No,” Marui replied honestly.

Jackal sighed. “I wanted to know if you would split a salad? Akaya doesn’t eat anything healthy and I can’t eat the big ones myself.”

Marui’s phone buzzed.

**I think I see you. Your friend said your name just now.**

Marui turned, looking, but didn’t see anyone like Niou in the café. The only pictures he saw of Niou were from that sketchy app, and those were below the chin shots without a lot of clothes. He only knew Niou’s hair color because the guy had long ass hair.

Marui turned around completely. The old man at the table behind him had turned as well, and he wasn’t an old man at all. It was a drop dead gorgeous man with piercings and a wicked grin.

Niou moved his hands in strange patterns—sign language, maybe?

“What?” Marui asked. Niou frowned.

The man sitting with Niou pushed up his glasses and said, “He said that you should check your phone again.”

Marui grabbed for his phone, ignoring Jackal (“What’s going on? You know him? Is he that guy you’ve been texting that you’ve never met?”).

Marui read the new messages.

**I’m mute.**

**I can’t talk.**

Marui looked up from his phone at Niou, who stared at him with large, nervous eyes. His piercings were hotter than Marui imagined. Marui never pictured him with blue eyes, either. 

Marui smiled. “Good thing you have my number, huh? Maybe you could text me sometime.”

Niou grinned and reached for his phone.


End file.
